Trust is essential to the core of our existence but when it is destroyed it leaves us helpless and defenseless. Where there is no trust, fear will rule our life. And can become difficult to overcome in order to live a successful life.
Past experiences can play a major role in the development of trust issues. And can begin as early as childhood based on what you’ve seen in your parents’ relationships. Or what you’ve seen in the relationship of others. Abuse, neglect, and violent behavior are some of the things that will hinder your ability to trust others. It can be especially difficult if you carry the emotional damage into other areas of your life. When making a transition. It can be painful because of the personal sacrifice.
There are some who don’t ever think it’s necessary to change. As long as they’re content with the life they live and can keep doing the same things. Sadly, they will miss the blessing. When failing to learn from the experience and embrace the lesson.
For those who have been betrayed or felt abandoned, this is an example of what their life may look like. Every encounter is suspect. The motives of others are questionable. And in some cases, we can’t trust ourselves and become paranoid with unresolved issues. We even start blaming ourselves for the way things turned out. We feel unworthy. And say it was our fault that it didn’t turn out right.
Sadly, many don’t understand the impact trust has on a person’s emotional or psychological well-being. And even worse, while you may still be in bondage, they have moved on with their life only to bring the same issues into the place they may find themselves. When in reality, their life too is meaningless. Be it a spouse, significant other, a job, or a relationship. They will start where they left off in a new place but the same issues still will exist. Nothing is resolved even if they try to replace it.
Trust issues will transfer into the “new” life that really is still the “old” life. It’s just with another person, in another place, or with another thing. It’s the same life. The same implications will exist no matter what you may see, based on what success you think your life will bring.
When trust is broken it can destroy a person emotionally, physically, and mentally. The mind may become confused, impaired, and irreparable clouding your perception and your reality. Some may harbor resentment, resistance and may become bitter. Some will seek revenge. Others may look to God for refuge and give him control to avenge.
But what happens when you think you’ve conquered the issue of trust and one day encounter one of the very people or thing that led to it. And your reaction clearly validates you’re not over it. But instead you’re still bound by it. We all have been there. Trust me. I know. I lived it.
What do you do when you run into someone you once knew and they ask “How are you?” You begin to speak about how good God has been to you. How God changed your life. You notice the expression on their face. They’re as quiet as a mouse. They have nothing to say about their life. You sense something troubling about them. But you can’t put your finger on it. You place it in the back of your mind and remind yourself to pray for them.
You say your good-byes and something comes over you. You start thanking God because he knew. Grateful He removed you from that place to protect you. You found forgiveness and have started life anew.
Although a void in your life may exist. External fulfillment will hinder your ability to honestly evaluate what you assume drives your existence versus what is required. I believe the first thing necessary is prayer to discern how to begin working on voids that will diminish your own selfish desires. Second is to seek God’s plan. It’s required.
In order to move on from your past hurts, use prayer and God for strength to overcome. Voids can be used as the catalyst in the building of a foundation to place you at a greater level than where you see yourself. It will help you begin the process of starting over and heal, with God’s help.
As believers, fear is not an option. Nor should it be a hindrance. We mustn’t become bound by it. Even if people may have walked out on you, walk by faith and the power God has given. For it is because of God’s faithfulness that we are still living. There may be others who rejected, hurt, or abused you. There may even be some who don’t accept you. God still will elevate you, “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7 KJV). You will be healed, in time.
Your heart may have been broken. God knows and can see it. Surrender your will to him in your brokenness and he will fix it. You may have experienced trials, tribulations, and pain. Go to God. We need God in all things. Be honest with God and acknowledge where your heart stands. Come to Him, naked and unashamed. Proclaim deliverance. God doesn’t change. He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever. No weapon formed against you shall prosper.
God’s Word contains a solution for every problem, a promise for every need, a plan to prosper you and not harm you. He has plans for you to succeed. Trust him and he will send resolve for that which binds you. He knows your future. He’s with, for, on side, in front, and behind you.
Trust God in your brokenness. His grace will heal you.
Be blessed! -JD
Proverbs 3:5-8 NIV “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. 7 Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the LORD and depart from evil. 8 It will be health to your flesh, And strength to your bones.”