Tag Archives: Emotional abuse

By His Stripes We Are Healed

English: Broken Heart symbol

English: Broken Heart symbol (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

A broken heart in conflict with the mind cannot speak to another person’s pain. A healed heart that reflects God’s heart can.

When filled with brokenness, the heart is hardened and shattered into pieces that seem hard to mend.  We’re convinced the heart has been damaged beyond repair and can’t ever be healed again.

When our heart has been broken the mind is met with conflict, denial, and resistance. The pain will run so deeply where we find ourselves in a state of confusion. Our thoughts become inconsistent.

We will close ourselves off to any and everything. We won’t allow anyone we feel can be of help to come in. Not even ones who can offer advice or spiritual guidance that will help us mend. When others try to encourage us, we don’t feel like they are saying the right things.

We believe in that moment because the heart has been irreparably damaged, there’s no fixing it. There’s no advice anyone can give us to make us feel better. We can’t see the good or God in it. There are no activities we want to engage in that will make the pain go away. Simply put, when in this state, we believe there is nothing that will cure the pain and heartache.

Then we throw all our emotions into a bag, close, pack and will carry the weight on our shoulders. We will carry a heavy burden, coupled with lost emotions, repeating feelings of hurt over and over.

Tugging emotional baggage is like a heavy suitcase being opened only to find it filled with locks and chains bound together. That cannot be broken without the help of something to cut loose the metal. As is a person who is broken and have become emotionally damaged and confused. And it feels like we have been taken advantage of, wondering why we were emotionally abused.

When the heart conflicts with the mind, we tend to do things that are unconventional. Our thoughts become irrational. We behave out of character. We begin to look to ourselves for answers.

There’s uncertainty in our hearts. On our own, we try to work it out. We will harbor fear and self doubt. And will take our focus off God and place it on us. And unfortunately will fail to see what was right in front of us…God. The very thing we needed to find peace, deliverance, and healing. We looked to ourselves instead of God for healing.

God is the answer. He will give you strength to overcome and work it out. He won’t allow you to go through it alone. You will overcome without a doubt.

When the heart wants what the mind doesn’t. Don’t confuse one with the other. Get them in sync with one another. Even when your heart is broke it deserves recovery. Pray and ask God to heal your heart, even if it doesn’t happen immediately. He will do it, if you let him. He will set your soul free.

It is okay to hurt but we mustn’t put so much focus on something that is not working. Yes, we’re in pain and may be broken. But God will fix our hearts again. He is a mind-regulator and a heart fixer. God is a healer. He will make you whole again.

Seek him. Focus on His Word. Not your will. Be dedicated, committed, and obedient to his will. He is the only one that can fill the hole in our heart. He can remove the void. And when it comes time to live again, we will not be led by our damaged heart. But will be led by the joy in knowing we have been restored with the goodness of God’s heart. In order that God’s purpose may be fulfilled. Our heart will reflect God’s heart once again.

By His stripes we are healed.

Be blessed! -JD

Psalm 73:26 “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” (ESV)

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Trust God in Your Brokenness

Trust is essential to the core of our existence but when it is destroyed it leaves us helpless and defenseless. Where there is no trust, fear will rule our life. And can become difficult to overcome in order to live a successful life.

Past experiences can play a major role in the development of trust issues. And can begin as early as childhood based on what you’ve seen in your parents’ relationships. Or what you’ve seen in the relationship of others. Abuse, neglect, and violent behavior are some of the things that will hinder your ability to trust others. It can be especially difficult if you carry the emotional damage into other areas of your life. When making a transition. It can be painful because of the personal sacrifice.

There are some who don’t ever think it’s necessary to change. As long as they’re content with the life they live and can keep doing the same things. Sadly, they will miss the blessing. When failing to learn from the experience and embrace the lesson.

For those who have been betrayed or felt abandoned, this is an example of what their life may look like. Every encounter is suspect. The motives of others are questionable. And in some cases, we can’t trust ourselves and become paranoid with unresolved issues. We even start blaming ourselves for the way things turned out. We feel unworthy. And say it was our fault that it didn’t turn out right.

Sadly, many don’t understand the impact trust has on a person’s emotional or psychological well-being. And even worse, while you may still be in bondage, they have moved on with their life only to bring the same issues into the place they may find themselves. When in reality, their life too is meaningless. Be it a spouse, significant other, a job, or a relationship. They will start where they left off in a new place but the same issues still will exist. Nothing is resolved even if they try to replace it.

Trust issues will transfer into the “new” life that really is still the “old” life. It’s just with another person, in another place, or with another thing. It’s the same life. The same implications will exist no matter what you may see, based on what success you think your life will bring.

When trust is broken it can destroy a person emotionally, physically, and mentally. The mind may become confused, impaired, and irreparable clouding your perception and your reality. Some may harbor resentment, resistance and may become bitter. Some will seek revenge. Others may look to God for refuge and give him control to avenge.

But what happens when you think you’ve conquered the issue of trust and one day encounter one of the very people or thing that led to it. And your reaction clearly validates you’re not over it. But instead you’re still bound by it. We all have been there. Trust me. I know. I lived it.

What do you do when you run into someone you once knew and they ask “How are you?” You begin to speak about how good God has been to you. How God changed your life. You notice the expression on their face. They’re as quiet as a mouse. They have nothing to say about their life. You sense something troubling about them. But you can’t put your finger on it. You place it in the back of your mind and remind yourself to pray for them.

You say your good-byes and something comes over you. You start thanking God because he knew. Grateful He removed you from that place to protect you. You found forgiveness and have started life anew.

Although a void in your life may exist. External fulfillment will hinder your ability to honestly evaluate what you assume drives your existence versus what is required. I believe the first thing necessary is prayer to discern how to begin working on voids that will diminish your own selfish desires. Second is to seek God’s plan. It’s required.

In order to move on from your past hurts, use prayer and God for strength to overcome. Voids can be used as the catalyst in the building of a foundation to place you at a greater level than where you see yourself. It will help you begin the process of starting over and heal, with God’s help.

As believers, fear is not an option. Nor should it be a hindrance. We mustn’t become bound by it. Even if people may have walked out on you, walk by faith and the power God has given. For it is because of God’s faithfulness that we are still living. There may be others who rejected, hurt, or abused you. There may even be some who don’t accept you. God still will elevate you, “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7 KJV). You will be healed, in time.

Your heart may have been broken. God knows and can see it. Surrender your will to him in your brokenness and he will fix it. You may have experienced trials, tribulations, and pain. Go to God. We need God in all things. Be honest with God and acknowledge where your heart stands. Come to Him, naked and unashamed. Proclaim deliverance. God doesn’t change. He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever. No weapon formed against you shall prosper.

God’s Word contains a solution for every problem, a promise for every need, a plan to prosper you and not harm you. He has plans for you to succeed. Trust him and he will send resolve for that which binds you. He knows your future. He’s with, for, on side, in front, and behind you.

Trust God in your brokenness. His grace will heal you.

Be blessed! -JD

Proverbs 3:5-8 NIV “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. 7 Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the LORD and depart from evil. 8 It will be health to your flesh, And strength to your bones.”

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