Tag Archives: respect

Mothers whoever you are and Children Too, This One is For You

Be careful how you treat your mother because there will come a day when she will not be on this side of heaven. But will be taken up to glory with God on the other side of heaven. You won’t be able to say “I love you” or call or text her or pass her in the wind. Once she’s gone, she’s gone. It will be the end. Cherish your mother. Tell her you love her if not always, every now and then. Appreciate her while she’s here. Because once the memory fades there is no fixing what you failed to appreciate while she was here.

I know this is a long post and I apologize for the lengthy thought, but this has been on my heart for a few days and I couldn’t help but share my thoughts.

My heart is heavy laden. I’m confused with children of today. God I know you sent mothers and fathers as gifts and deemed us salt of the earth. So are our children too. But I don’t understand why they do what they do. Sometimes they are in extreme opposition to your opinions and no matter what you do, will place blame on any or everything you do.

When they’re young, we look at them in admiration wishing they would hurry and walk, talk, and grow as we embrace them. Our hearts are overjoyed with this precious life you have given. We come to the conclusion there is nothing we wouldn’t do for them. We make sure there are clothes on their backs, shoes on their feet, a roof over their head, and food to eat. We will go to the ends of the earth and in most cases lay down our life for them. We are willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for them.

We watch them grow over the years as they become adults. We want nothing but the best for them and try our best not to place fault, when things don’t turn out as they want. We stay on our knees in prayer asking you cover them because we want to prepare them for what’s to come. Since we already know what life will throw at them; which will make it that much more difficult to overcome. We cast all our cares upon you concerning them. We know because of your love for each of us, you will protect, guide, and keep them.

We must be careful how we treat our mother. She is a gift from God. There is no need to put blame on everything she does. But choose not to place the same blame on others regardless of what he or she does. This includes the things you do. Because it feels like you are competing with your past and want to prove a point to them and you. Ask yourself, how can everything be wrong with her but there’s nothing wrong with me? When you’re on the outside looking in, you cannot grasp the wrong in things you are doing or take the time to see. But if it is pointed out to you, learn to accept constructive criticism when you’re told of the wrong things you do.

God help me understand, who are these children we profess to love but feel they can’t show the same appreciation or love towards us? Why does it have to be a constant battle between us? What happens when you live each day and pass each other in the wind? You only feel the need to talk or call when you need something. When she calls you don’t answer. Time passes by you text, and they still don’t answer. But can find time to talk to others whether it’s a sister, brother, or a friend. But why is it you choose not to answer the phone most of the time for her? This is confusing.

There are events you take part in that take precedence in your life. But can’t find a moment to call out of the blue and say “I love you” or make the sacrifice. You make it clear no calls can be received at work. But when something requires your attention during this time, you make the sacrifice to get calls at work to make sure everything is fine. Everything has to fit in your schedule according to your plans. But remember, your plans are not God’s plans. God knows and see all you do. And one day when it’s too late, you will reap what you sow all because of you.

Don’t get me wrong, granted there are some good times you share with your children and will cherish the memory. Not every child will do these things even though some will choose to live in misery. There are some children who will go through some things and you will do your best to be there for all of them. There may be one child who you know loves you unconditionally. Every time you speak or hear from them, they will tell you “Mom I love you.” It’s comforting. Mothers are a gift from God. They are treasured memories. I just have to wonder why it is so hard for children to embrace this.

Yes, I confess I have faults. There are some things I don’t always get right. But I can admit my faults and humbly submit to God’s will as I make the sacrifice to make things right. There are times I can be stubborn and will block my own blessing. Yet, when I get angry and choose to refuse help it’s because I feel uncomfortable when I may feel your reaction was unnecessary. When I feel someone is doing something not out of love but out of obligation. I make the decision to refuse help without hesitation. I know it is not the right thing to do. God, please be patient with me. I am working on this too.

In this life, we all have had jobs that either was hard or satisfying. At some point, we enjoyed what we were doing or gave up trying. And sometimes we are given the choice to walk away from it if it is not fulfilling. Or we will keep at it to find success because it is fulfilling. But I find one of the most astute occupations for anyone is being a parent. And I can attest to the fact that the role we are given can be the hardest job ever. It can be even more difficult when children grow up and seem to have various opinions that are in conflict with yours. You chalk it up as a lesson learned. And although some parents will choose to walk away, for others it is not a choice we make. We make the decision to stay.

We age and with aging many things will change. Our body tells us some things aren’t going to operate the same. As believers, we live and we learn. When we come to know God, as we grow and mature we take stride in adapting to changes from lessons we learn. Sometimes we learn hard lessons and decide we don’t want to ever do that again. And then there are times we keep doing the same things over and over again. We fail to learn and get stuck in our old ways. We have trouble adapting and accepting change.

If you think about it, children who grow up will endure the same process. But they may have even a much harder time accepting why we change in the process. Granted they too can get stuck in their ways, but why it is they think it’s acceptable, whether young or old, to do what you used to do and not what you say.

What happened to the old days when children used to say, “Yes ma’am, no sir, excuse me ma’am, how are you today?” What about the times when you made sure a moment didn’t go by without calling Mom or Dad just to say, “I love you” not just today but every day. What about a phone call here or there just to check up on their well-being? Nowadays its cell phones with the option to ignore calls, which I find meaningless. And you can sense when this happens when it goes to voicemail. Or text messages you receive only when they need a favor. Or they tell you, “You have a phone just as I do. Why do I always have to be the one to call you?’ Or “I’m busy, don’t call me at work but you can call me later.” Yet, if something arises at work that they need to get done, they will call you sooner rather than later.

Respect, where did it go? Sadly, it has gone out the window. The only thing we can do is accept what God presents to us in that circumstance and be thankful for the blessing. From the test, learn the lesson. My advice, take this lesson with you. And remember this in all you do. God requires you obey your parents while you are under their care, but it is your responsibility to honor your parents for life. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother – which is the first commandment with a promise – that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” (Eph 6:1-3). This is God’s promise.

Mothers whoever you are and children too, this one is for you. Remember, God loves each and every one of you.

Be blessed! -JD

Exodus 20:12 “Honor your father and your mother, so that your may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” (NIV)

20:12 notes:  “This is the first commandment with a promise attached. What does it mean to “honor” parents? Partly, it means speaking well of them and politely to them. It also means acting in a way that shows them courtesy and respect (but not to obey them if this means disobedience to God). It means following their teaching and example of putting God first. Parents have a special place in God’s sight. Even those who find it difficult to get along with their parents are still commanded to honor them.”

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Death And Life Are In The Power of The Tongue

I stumbled upon this article the other day on my tablet and out of my curiosity because of the title that peaked my interest; I decided I would read it.

http://thegrio.com/2013/03/11/fox-news-guest-receives-rape-death-threats-following-gun-segment/

17.-Encourage-sunsetWhile reading, I couldn’t help but feel the depth of my soul being torn into pieces as I tried my best not to let tears run from my eyes, not criticize, nor place judgment on ones mentioned in the article that were making such brutal statements as well as threats to a woman who clearly was a victim not by her choice.

It took great effort on my part to keep my mouth shut and think before I comment or make any statements so as not to offend anyone or come out of character.

Not to mention after watching the video on guns and rape, I got an immediate headache but couldn’t say a thing because it was another issue I didn’t have time to address.

Proverbs 18:21 tells us “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.”And if we are not careful, words can be a death sentence to some unsuspecting soul who undoubtedly did not ask for the humiliation, disrespect, or harsh judgment at their expense.

For those that know me know I am against gun violence and am a strong opponent of various gun control/gun violence laws. And whenever I read or hear anything that addresses the issue of guns, I feel compelled to speak out.

While I have expressed my views in the past, I don’t have time to reiterate my views on the subject matter in creation of this post.

What I will say though is, I must agree with the young lady in this video segment that “Giving every woman a gun is not rape prevention.” I believe guns will not prevent rape or violence. They will do the opposite and increase more violence. And I will leave it at that.

There are a million things I can say right now, but the only thing I wish to state here is this:

There are people in this world that can be so cruel without thinking about the impact their words have on others and oftentimes, don’t even care what it does to the person’s self-esteem, let alone their character. Then I ask, “How?” “How can someone be of this nature and not have an ounce of empathy or respect for people who are victims at no fault of their own?” But find it okay to tear them down instead of build them up? I don’t understand. Am I missing something?

I had to take a moment to express my thought about people who I find, either, do not have a heart or are just mean-spirited without a clue. Who most likely need help or are hiding some deep-rooted issue they are oblivious to. It is so sad.

It saddens me when I hear people speak about their experiences of abuse of any kind or victims of rape who survived and are now courageous enough to speak about how it literally destroyed and/or changed their lives. All while trying to pick up the pieces to find some normalcy as a result of the traumatic event. As such, I commend them because I believe they are victors, not victims of their circumstances. They overcame. They survived to tell about it.

I also get perturbed when I hear people making unwise statements like this, “They deserved it.” “They were asking for it.” “It was her fault.” Again, I ask, “Really?” Why would any person believe it is okay to say things like this without questioning their own integrity?

My thought: We all at some point will encounter some form of abuse, be it physically, mentally, verbally, even spiritually. And while many of us may never know what its like to be the victim of rape, keep in mind that it can happen to anyone. But let’s be clear…. it is never the victim’s fault.

We must be careful with our words and what we choose to say to people or about others. We all have a cross to bear and should never minimize what others are going through or what they have to deal with. We don’t know what burdens they bear or how they are managing to get through the unpleasant situation.

We all are a victim to something in this life and we all will have a cross to bear. But what we must realize is, just as it can happen to them, there may come a time when it can happen to someone you may know or love. Don’t be so quick to judge.

Please be careful with your words. Let your actions be an indication of not who you are but who you desire to be in the lives of others; a blessing and not a curse. Don’t tear down, but build up. Don’t bring hurt or harm, but protect.

Jesus did. Why can’t you?

Death and life are in the power of the tongue. Choose your words wisely.

Be blessed! –JD

Ephesians 4:29 “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.”

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Does Reverence Of God Require Us To Change?

I had a strange premonition the other day where I couldn’t get my mind off  the subject of change and reverence to God. I tried to push it to the back of my mind but something kept prompting me to address it. So today, I chose to briefly take a look at reverence and change as I share how it came about in my life and what I believe God expects us to do with it.

When I was younger, I feared change. I didn’t like the idea of having to transition to new things in my life. I didn’t like having to make new friends or go to a new school or live in a new place or be in new surroundings. I was comfortable and wanted things to remain the same…forever.

But as with anything in life, change is a part of it. In order to transition from one setting to another, one must be willing and open to change their surroundings in order to sustain. It is required. As such, I couldn’t help but make the connection to change as it relates to spiritual growth and determined through spiritual development, reverence to God was also a part of change that was required.

While I had been raised in the church by my Mother and Great-grandmother basically all my life, as a young child I reverenced God. Although at the time I really did not have a clear understanding of what it meant, all I know is I feared him in my heart. My desire was to do what was right to please him.

When I became an adult and began to closely follow God I realized change was required in order to grow and mature. Not that my circumstances may change, but God wanted to change me within my circumstances. This would allow me to become a better person and work to develop the same characteristics as God. Without God serving as the blueprint to shape my life, how could I fully follow the foundation that was set before me?

At a young age I never departed from the love, respect, and awe I have for God. And even at the age I find myself now, the love I have for God is astounding. It is beyond words.

Granted there are times when I struggle with sustaining, the overall goal is to follow God wholeheartedly. To love him with all my heart and with all my soul and with all my mind, with a desire to live in obedience to his commandments.

It took some time to get to where I am now, but no matter the circumstance whenever I find myself reacting or responding to situations or people in an inappropriate manner, my first thought is, “Do you think God would be pleased?” I’d follow with an answer, “No.” And because I know better, this in turn would prompt me to work to change the behavior and the attitude so that I may bring honor and glory to Him. Life had new meaning and purpose for me.

As I grow older I’ve learned to accept change as a part of life. Take the bitter with the sweet, the good with the bad. I’ve also learned that with change comes opportunity; we either live on purpose or live in fear with no purpose. The latter at some point will make life seem meaningless.

I believe in order to be made whole we must first learn to love God in order to love ourselves. Acknowledgment of God’s love is a key component to our future development.

Our life starts not with what we know or how good we are, but with whom we know; God. Our purpose of life should be to revere Him. It’s where we stand in awe of Him.

God is above, not below us. He controls everything in the earth that concerns us. To reverence Him is to show respect. It’s all in his hands. We are to follow his commands. Recognize, and honor his divine authority. God is all-powerful. He has dominion over everything.

Not only will we have respect for him but will respect others too. Not because of the positions they hold or what they do; but because who they are in Christ to you; your sisters and brothers. Your love of God will be shared with one another.

We are at his disposal. Therefore we must please him in everything we do. We must be able to acknowledge him in all our ways. And follow his laws the rest of our days.

Fear, on the other hand, is our motivation to surrender to God. It is where He resides in our hearts. Evidenced in promises he made and what he’s done. His love never fades. The utmost respect of his authority will be held. Without trust, obedience cannot prevail.

We all have a divine purpose. But it is impossible to fulfill your purpose without God. When you put him first, change will come. Not by what you’ve done but who you will become. Above all, let your life begin with Him. God is your purpose. Build your life around him. Gain knowledge and wisdom as you seek to know Him.

Reverence builds purpose in our relationship with God. It is the sum total of who we are. It helps us grow in maturity. It increases our relationship, our faith, and our belief.

Change is inevitable. We can’t run from it. We must learn to embrace it. Change the way you think, act, and speak. Look for God to guide you in every step you take. He will order your steps to bring you to the place. He set before you to run the race.

Let God begin a work in you. Follow God and he will do the rest for you. Reverence Him in all you do.

Psalm 89:7 God is greatly to be feared in the assembly of the saints, And to be held in reverence by all those around Him.

Psalm 111:10 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; A good understanding have all those who do His commandments. His praise endures forever.

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